Time for Reform -Whastyle

This article by Agent Orange got me fired up and thinking. So here it goes. At one time there was a pseudo joke of Wha-Nobrainer 2020-something. By that time we will both be of age to run the show. After the article I have our director of homeland security pegged, especially considering his fmaily proximty and experience with 9/11 events. I think the platform will be something like the following with regards to brief comments on each issue. Granted, a few of our issues will be split, but hey, I think it makes for a better TEAM. He'll appear to more of hte libertarian feel, I got the traditional rebuplican thing downand relate to Joe Average pretty well with many of my shananigans that I will talk freely about. A little personlaity will help politics, Kept Clinton in for 8 years. Need a Republican rebuttle to that. Without further adoo:

Immigration - Get them the hell out. They cross, without papers, shoot 'em. They keep crawling, shoot 'em again. Citizens of the United States have, for the most part, less NYC ethnic gang wars ala recent movies, accepted immigrants from foreign countries with open arms. At one time, most went through formal processes, bothered to learn at least chunks of the language, and brought a little spice that makes this country great. I'm all for allowing others to come here and make a better life. In one way or another, all our families are here for the very same reason. I just ask that they do it right. If you can't play by the rules, we throw your cheatin ass out of the game. No one likes a cheater, they will not be tolerated.

Welfare/Social Security - Scrap it. Spend a fraction of the funds educating people how to save their cash for later on, or at least how to put it to work. Oh and work, yeah, if your other family members aren't supporting you, get a job. Got kids? Fine, we'll sponsor day schools. If your income is below a set amount, you will pay a fractional amount. They will be staffed by others who need jobs as well. It may not be as good as what the CEO's kids go to but your kid will be fine and may actually learn to get along with others. And you won't have a need for food stamps or the ability to say that childcare costs more than you can make. We'll even cut you some slack and hook you up for 6 mo in the case a loved one passes that has been supporting the family. After that you better hope the insurance was paid up or you haven't been sitting on your ass, cause those checks will quit coming.

Defense and International Relations - Screw with us or our allies and we will whoop your ass. We will sell our cool stuff to our friends but only after we have developed new super secret cool stuff to kick you ass even more. Stuff not even Discovery Channel knows about. It will be like Reagan and Star Wars again. Saw it on a movie, liked it, Northup Grumman, go build it. Have your people protest against us all you want, don't expect us to do business with you. You will learn that the protesting is a losing situation for you only. We are resilient for a relatively young country and our true grit only really comes out when you force it. Don't force it, you won't like the result. If you are a candy ass, say you want to verbally back us, then don't. We cut ties with you. Liars are looked upon about the same as cheaters. You will be tossed out of our game. I'm pretty sure Britian and Australia like us. So do some other places that know where their bread is buttered so to speak. Yeah, Wal Mart won't be as cheap, but no one really likes going there anyway. Oh, and all the industry we outsourced, we'll need it back. All you folks bitching about not being able to work, jobs, their baaaacccckkkk! So welfare becomes a moot point anyway.

Healthcare - Yeah, we need a program, honestly. I'm not saying everyone gets everything for free but everyone will get an alotment. We don't have welfare or Social Secuirty to fund anyway so there is some cash in the coffers. Children under 10 and foggies over 70 get more than the middle age folks. If you are that age and sick, it's because you didn't take care of yourself. You also have the abilty to work, so paying for your fees over the alotment shouldn't be a problem anyway. Insurance will still be an option too, so don't sweat too hard. Yeah and the fee/alotment thing, you want better care, fork over the dough. I'm not sending you to Duke on the countries dime, Carolinas Medical is just fine. The difference is on you. This one will need more thought and tweaking I'm sure.

Alternate Energy -
Solar is a pretty good idea. I think Arizona and California have lots of sunny spots that no one lives in or even visits for the beauty. They would make good places to make up some juice. I like wind and hydro too. We have lots of running water and the last time I checked there was always a breeze near the coast. I think we know what New Orleans will be good for now? Mardi Gras at the Windmill farm...woo hoo. Yeha, west TX, you fit the bill too along with all you places in the mid/southwest where you have oil dericks. Keep pumping but we are going to strap a few pin wheels to towers on your land and double up the energy your plot is producing. Never fear, you'll get pair, utilities will remain private and they will have to buy/lease the land and provide the equipment. Oh, and there is this thing called Nuclear. If you stick them in mountains the bad stuff can't get out. So much for that danger.

Tax Reform -
Flat tax. You don't make a lot, that sucks. You make a ton, good for you. We need the same percentage regardless. hey, it's all ratios so the rich will be paying more, don't worry. Most of these loop holes will be crap canned, both personal and business. John Kerry won't get to pay $50 while you and I pay $500 because he has some screwy situational clause to apply for being a reformed hippy. After Defense and Healthcare, we won't need a whole lot anyway. Just some cash for funding travling arts groups to promote some poignant liberal activities as well as museums and park systems. Some of that stuff is cool and shouldn't be just for the wealthy. Make their asses stand in line every now and then for the good tickets too. It's governemnt run, so the point is only to approach breaking even on expenses, and not like the pro sports do with ticket prices. We'll figure this one out too.

Government -
Most of us will have to go get real jobs. one way or another. Pres capped at two terms. House Members and Senators at four. No more ability to to raise your own salary or benefits. It's a set amount, more if you chair a committee. Adjusted for inflation based on economic indicators only. Part of your pay is the honor of serving your country if you didn't do so in the military. By the way, if you work hard and show leadership, I'm pretty sure our thriving industry will want to hire you. If you suck and dont really do anything, welcome back to the real world. My local Wal-Mart needs another cashier in a bad way, especially Sunday afternoons. Get your crap together and do something productive or learn how to use the scanner in a hurry.

Abortion- I'm against it but I'm not you and it's your child. You make the call. If babies daddy is against having it and you want to keep it, you have two options, place for adoption, or don't expect him to have to pay. This only kicks it at time of conception. You can't "get out" after the first tri-mester fellas. It takes two to tango, both get to shoulder the responsibility and decision making. Rape and sexual assault cases are differnt for obvious reason, all up to the mother, she never was afforded the decision in these cases.

Gun Control -
You can have as many as you want. You must register them just in case you do something stupid later. Committed a heinous crime or are a sex offender? You forfeited your right to carry one. Quit your bithcin'. If everyone has the ability to pack, then I don't think messing with them is agreat idea. Your IQ small enough to think it's a good idea? I hope they shoot your ass because they can. It will always be self defense, the lawyers won't have time to do your case, see below

Lawyers and Judges-
Quotas will be placed on how many can practice in a county in a particular field. They also won't be able to pass legislation as congressmen regarding redistricting or incorporation to "shrink and multiply" the municipalties that they are restricted within. They will be forced to work on cases that are legit not frivolous stuff because of milited hours in a day. Better hope the existing ones find your case interesting, otherwise, you won't be going to court unless you can manage to represent yourself. Judges will lay down sentences. Parol for causing death of any kind will not be tolerated. You get 10 yrs or two retrials to prove you were innocent. Doesn't happen and you are in for life, your life ends. More cash for the system to run properly and support the arts and education. I think $30K is much better spent on motivating our teachers than supporting a crack addicted in prison who killed a child with a stray bullett, or for that matter, a drunk driver who killed anyone else in the accident.

Education-
Haven't run the numbers but I see we axed Welfare, Social Security and took a big chunk out of fleeced government expenditures and law system. All the rest goes to Education. Budget surpluses equal bonues both to high perfomring classrooms and ones that have shown marked improvement. I see lots and lots of money going here. Oh, and no teacher gets tenure. It's now run like private business. Our product is educated youth. Failing to make a good product is like not making shareholder profit. You are sinking your company, which in this case is the country.

I think that about sums up my ideas for tonight. If you like it, spread it around. If you don't, too bad, don't vote for me/us. After writing this, there will definitely be points Nobrainer disagrees on. If so, he can bail whenever and run on his own ticket, I understand. This is what I would like to see so if he does take a different overall approach I'm looking for other running mates.

That'll piss ya off

I've spent the last 9 years using the same calculator. Not just any calculator either. None of this sissy TI-85 crap, no an HP-48GX with expandable memory capacity that sucks down triple a batteries like a kids juice box. This thing had expandable that existed before anyone really knew what it meant and could be programmed for stuff I still can't fathom doing. Most importantly, if entered properly, it could convert any measurement from SI to Imperial units in a few quick key strokes. Many folks went through a couple in college due to the rough and tumble abuse of that lifestyle but mine was fortunateto make it as well as most of my first four years out of school. How I don't know as the damn thing kicked out some messed up numbers and was thrown a couple times. However, it was often given due credit as the one thing most attriutable to graduation. As I pulled it out for work Friday morning and to extreme dismay, the screen was inner cell was cracked and a blob of mystery fluid/plasma was covering most of the screen. Though the internal operations still appear to operate and it can be used for basic output, the full usefulness has been compromised. I am extremely upset as you can tell. Those outside the realm of Clemson Engineering between '95 and '03 may not understand and I don't expect them to. Classes changed, pencils broke, and computers crashed but the HP and it's reverse polar notation was always there with an annoying beep when you performed an action not allowed (adding two number when only one had been entered for example). The calculator had even brought a reputation here as when it was broken out smart comments abounded. My biggest concern? Going back to a regular calculator or heaven forbid, an adding machine that works like neither a standard calculator nor the machine I have so well bonded with. A little liquor will be poured out in it's memory this week. It may have happened Friday night, but I don't think anyone can remeber honoring it.

WHAtch out o'er thur!

As many know and most of this readership, or at least respondents know, this weeknd forces of the Clemson world between '96 and'03 collide in Chucktown to celebrate the right of passage to honeydoodum for one Mr. Benjamin Louis Heilmann ('01, '03) of Raleigh, NC. Yeah, I am prepping this shit for Clemson World publication. Granted the actual ceremony isn't for two more months and the activities in the next 72 hours could constitute revokation of acceptance on his bride to be's behalf we are gathering to give him one last breath of true single manhood. It will be ugly, the dreaded ball and chain will be slapped on tight and done at an early hour. Much Jager and Red Bull will be consumed, a golf course will be abused by some, bars will regret the party of 12, and a strippers ass may get slapped all in good, somewhat clean, fun. Hell, Carn may even put a down payment on a family, again. This occurence, as a whole, has been planned in some form or fashion since this fall. The soon to be Misses knows what is going to ensure and has faith in her future husband. A warranted faith I may add as it's the group that scares the hell out of me. Thousands of miles will be traveled for the party to assemble and most do not expect to see the light of day until after the noon hour on Saturday. I'm sure edited versions of the weekend will crop out in the realms of the Agent, Funk, Nobrainer, back here and within comments elsewhere. If all goes as planned this will be a weekend that stories and legends are born. I just hope no one has to lie to Best Buy when it's all over about why their computer shorted out. Stay tuned kids, this could get interesting come Sunday.

Got a song

but I ain't got no melody. I got a blog button but I got no clue how to use it. Any suggestions? Somedays I am even more stupid than the rest. It looks kinda nifty but I don't know how to display it or link it to toher for display. It's like having a big ding dong but not having a place to stick it. I know all about the second part but not the first. Fun stuff.

I Fell Off

I fell off, I fell the fuck off. The wagon of course. Did you expect anything else from me? Just like any other Lent fasting, I never quite pull it off or have some loop hole like last year with no soft drinks (except for class purposes when I needed the kick). Anyway, things were and have been going well, less last Saturday. Did a little grilling, had a few brews, felt good, having a goodtime out and about and the dreaded Yeager Bomb was offered up. We had even taken a cab out to ensure minimalized stupidity, typically brought on by Jack's peer pressure. Well, upon surveying some fine female specimens and have unusually warm weather, we decided it was true party night and we weren't missing that boat. Bring 'em on, we'll repent later. Well, one turned into four plus beer chasers and what we were going through anyway. At least mixed drinks were never brought into the picture. With Patty's Day and the Hyman smack around, I mean bachelor party, I hope to hold strong. In true NCAA tourney form though, I only truly expect to go .500 on this prediction. I predict that if anything gets me, it will be the Car Bombs this week as I plan to be coherent in my abuse of Hug-a-bunch next weekend. By the way, if the guantlet hadn't been thrown down previously in his direction, it has been now. I think I'll go buy a lock this weekend.


Update: It has come to my attention that the Lent thing was ammended. We reverted back to no Jack during the 6 weeks as that was the original intent. Other alcohol is on. With that being said, if you have anything resembling an Irish Car Bomb ingredient near you this weekend, hide it. This is also applicable to vodka and cranberries prior to noon next weekend and Yeagerr bombs at any point. That is all.

Wha

Not Good

Most of us have been able to enjoy a rather pleasant life over the past few months. We fuss about work or something annoying like the delivery boy but nothing truly significant. Unfortunately for one of us in this little blog world, that changed this morning.
I just received a call from Paul (this is serious and not warrantling blog names) with some very bad news. Stacy (whom he has been dating seriously since the A&M game) lost her mom to cancer. She was in surgery this morning and her heart gave out and the doctors were unable to revive her. She has been battling lung and possibly other forms (I'm not eaxctly sure on this part) for many months. Things would go very well then a new complication would pop up. I even asked Paul this morning before work how things were going and foundout she was going back into surgery today. I didn't think a whole lot about it as this has not been completely uncommon in her fight and she has seemed to always come through just fine.
I ask that you keep Stacy, her family, and even Paul in your minds over the coming days. I know the family is losing a wonderful person. Having gotten to know Stacy over the past 6 months, she is one of the nicest, most well meaning people I have met. I can only think that the apple didn't fall from the tree in this respect, especially listening to the things Paul said about her mother and about how they had "clicked."
This has been a battle Paul has been helping Stacy with, having suffered through the same thing prior to college. Having also had a family member fight a battle with cancer, as well as having a close coworker done the same, it makes you count your blessings, and realize how fortuante many of us are to have our families, especially those who have been sick in the past.
Please keep Stacy and Paul in your thoughts.

The Wagon

Well, Fat Tuesday has come and gone, in a blur of course. Each of us in the apartment gave up on alcohol of some form or fashion. Skippy dropped liquor and beer, Poot and I dropped liquor, so no Jack. With my imminent move, and the multiple bottle of partially drank alcohol, the herd had to be thinned. No use tempting fate by having multiple options around. The quest to break last years Jack record has long since lost hope without the re-emergence of Sunday grilling. With that being said we threw the gauntlet down to see how many partial bottles could be finished off. Note none of these bottles were close to full but none were exactly struggling to fill it's last glass when we started. Those who fell included a handle of Jack, a 5th of Gentlemen Jack, a 5th of Disarrono, and a 5th of Crown. A run was made late at the 5th of Smirnoff blue label that was only half full to start the night but it has a solid drink or two left and I left most of a screwdriver on the table when I threw in the towel. All in all, we brought back flashes of glory and put the smack down on the liquor cabinet. Oh yeah, Skippy had a couple beers and a glass of the Disarrono, too.
If work doesn't ease up, I won't stay on this wagon long. Not unless someone finds a quick connection to an East Coast stash of Fat Tire. That could hold me over for 6 weeks without much problem.

Whatta Week

The past week started slow but as the watched pot doesn't boil, if you tok your eye off of it, you turned around to see it boiling over with things to talk about.

First, I returned to the gym in the other Under Armour top. No bleeding, but a little rubbing. Had potential to boil over so to speak but I lived. That was Thursday I believe. Friday, no serious gym issues with the shirt, didn't wear the armour. Today, I was good until I got home and knocked out the sit-ups. Nice little surprise when I looked down, yep, a little trail. I think it get's accentuated by the fact the armour pulls the sweat from the area it comes (top to bottom on me) so it gets ugly fast, none the less, embarrassing.
2nd on the list is SuperMac. He got published with the MACBOOST. anyone that can pull this off gets my props. And you thought he was a slacker? Get him motivated and you are screwed. He'll show you and everyone else their ass as seen above. Good job Mac, sell the hell out of em and remember the little people who help publicize (pimp) you later on. Congrats!
Next thing on the list, the folks came to town. As always a couple of good dinners and drinks on them. Oldest sister came as well with a friend. Always cool to have her in town. Got to impart big bro warnings on both of them as they are getting prepped for college in a year. I'm the big bro you all hated because I warned them in advance. Sue me, I'm actually responsible a little bit. Who'da thunk it?
Well while the folks were in town, we took a look at a couple houses that I had narrowed down from my search. There opinion was clear and was the shot in the arm that made the difference in the waffling I was going through. Newer house, near Lake Norman and all the fun stuff vs. older house near Ballantyne and all that has to offer. It boiled down to cash now and later vs. just cash now. I know the neighbors through work in Huntersville and now I am entered into a contract on it. Check it out here, Guess that means there is a place to crash in Charlotte now. At least plenty of floor space because really, what single guys needs furniture future women will want to replace anyway?
Guess that's it. Pending all the inspections and paperwork, I close in a month on March 31. Fun times. Taking Home of the Double D to a new level.

Frozen Over

In more than one way I think this is happening to Charlotte this weekend. For starters, I am going on a date tomorrow. Completely blind though I saw a pic of the girl in a yearbook provided by the women I work with who is responsible, via her children. I'm not afraid but recognize her from a while back and hope she doens't do the same, just in case I did something stupid (shocker there). This isn't the news though. I told Skippy I would take him out for his birthday like a month ago and finally was able to follow through. Hit Fox and Hound for a good dinner then went to a Martini place called Therapy, primarily toget a parking ticket validated (which we didn't and should have but only cost 5 bucks). Sat down and had an Young's double Chocolate Stout. I've had it before, comes in a pint bottle, a little strong, quite good. Did you expect me to have a martini or any other drink without the word Jack in it? Anyway, the waitress starts chatting us (me) up. notices the Clemson rings. She is a USuCk fan but went to COC. Skippy and I figure out where she is from. BAMBURG..hahahah. She definitely know Jeffords and her dad was her dentist. Well, she continues to show interest. Being a Martini joint we ask which she likes. One with a little Jager is mentioned, I notice and call her on it. Magically about 10 minutes later Skippy and I get treated (comped) to a Jager Bomb split two ways. It was good and according to the delivery person (not our waitress) they were from an admirer. 10 minutes later, it happen again. Comped not once, but twice! Hence, with the weather moving in and this, hell is freezing over. Skippy swears I was the one with the magic as he wasn't speaking much and she kept coming around and making lots of eye contact. She was cute, petite, and very friendly. Not the type I typically pull for no reason. We will see how all this goes but it was a nice change to have a woman (women) comp drinks, show interest, and be pleasant to talk to. My card with a note and my cell number on the back made it's way to the signed check. I almost got caught placing it but even pulled that off smoothly. I'll take it, especially if she actually calls. Things are looking up again but as I mentioned, rough weather is moving in and Charlotte may freeze over. If it does, everything will make sense, if not, back to the routine.

No, Seriously

OK, so this may be the most absurd and disturbing post I have made but I have to before Skippy beats me to it. A little background: Went to Dick's sporting goods and picked up some Under Armour shirts and undershorts to run in at the gym, last Sunday. Needed a little help in sweat abatement, heard good things, bought in. So I washed some darks (all but one shirt) prior to using them. I have super sensitive skin as many of you noticed wit hteh Hi-Five back in college. Anyway, went on Monday and Wednesday in one of the shirts post wash. No problems, a little tenderness on the chest region but no big deal. soaked the shirt but it dodn't hang nearly as heavy. Fast-forward to this evening. Broke out the new, white Under Armour. Hadn't washed it but thought I would take the chance on the skin thing. 30 min later, no problem, I should be good. Start my run, knock out my 3 mile run, and the other 1.5 cool down and additional jog. To be graphic, the nipples were a little tender. Didn't think much about it. Usual t-shirt hangs heavy due to said sweat but don't rub and irritate. I look down after I step off the treadmill 45 minutes later. Nice little red spot on my shirt. Have I picked a scab? Blemish decided to rid itself? Oh no, hell no. Apparently I have rubbed my nipple raw withte bouncing shirt and all it's chemical irritation. First thought through my head "shit". Sad thing, little do I know this has been going on for a while as I have essentially a stream from said nipple most of the way down my shirt. WTF!?! And I thought the one gym instructor was just laughing at a joke previously told, after walking by on the way out. Shit gets even better. I notice said stream in reflection of glass door as I am leaving. Oh, and there are hot chics in the gym at 7 on a Friday...single, obviously, with me, my stellar stamina performance, and bloody nipple in all it's glory. I get home, look down, it's not just one but both. I look like I am breast fedding blood to the bastard child of the devil. I don't know why, how, or if I even want to. I just know that I've taken the cliche " I think I rubbed it raw" to a new level. I write this to you about 6 hrs later. My nipples burn like hell and I'm afraid of ruining my sheets without saving my chest and wearing a freaking band-aid. Imagine that softball strawberry time 5 on the sting factor in the shower. It sucks. That is all. Good laughs to you, focker.

All Aboard!

The short bus is coming through to pick up the liberals, or at least at this site it is. I especially like this sticker as sent to me by Agent Orange. Too bad I didn't know about this place prior to my sisters trip to DC for a leadership conference. She could have packed one of these to go along with her "This is what a Young Republican looks like." shirt that appears to be too small across endowments from her mother. The Jeep should be donning the sticker once it's in part time service though.

I encourage everyone to get on the Elephant Train and start making jabs at the other side as often as possible.

Huggybunches

Bitch is going down March 24-26. Main urting will be adminstered on the nght of the 24th. If you work, take it off and get to party central. Those involved will no what I am talking about. I heard a nasty little rumor he only wanted to drink beer....thats a damn shame since I invested in Red Bull and a certain other beveage of thick consistency and a dark hue, a while back. Benny-boi, ask Agent Orange and Jimbo. I have a large say in what goes on, I have your eldest brother on board and I know the town we are going well enough. You are a dead man. Don't plan on knowing what the 25th of March looks like, other than the back of you eye lids. Bitch

Ooops!

I crapped my pants.


Have a great weekend.

Bumper Sticker

As seen on I-77 South yesterday on the side window of a late 90's ealy '00 Mitsubishi eclipse. Driver was obviously young/college age.

"Your little princess is my little whore."

I think this trumps "My kid beat up your honor student."

I got tagged

Agent Orange tagged me with a blog version of the chain mail. I think you have to add your own new four thing at the end, so if you play on add something new.


Four Jobs I’ve Had
Paint Specialist - Lowes
Line Worker - Kingport Book Bindery
Turbine Design Intern - G.E.
HVAC Sales Engineer - Hahn-Mason Air Systems (current)

Four Films I Can Watch Over and Over
Animal House
Feild of Dreams
Oceans Eleven
For Love of the Game

Four Places I’ve Lived
Stonega, VA
Kingsport, TN
Clemson, SC
Charlotte, NC

Four Current TV Shows I Enjoy
Boston Legal
The OC
Desperate Houswives
CSI-Miami

Four Foods I Like
Joey Bag of Donuts - Moes anywhere
Ribeye Steak - Straight off the Grille at home
Veal Parm - Guiseppi's in Kingsport
Anything my mom makes when I go home

Four Places I’ve Vacationed
Vail, CO
Hilton Head, SC
Venice, FL
San Fransisco, CA

Four Websites I Visit Daily
ESPN.com
Weather.com
Nailor.com
yahoo.com

Four Things I’d Like to Do Before I Die
Get My Pilots License
Be a good father/better grandfather
Run a company
Be admired for something good I do/have done for others

Four Things I Miss From College
Hall parties when I was on duty
Living at the Ridge
Greek Bowl
Homecoming Week

Four Living People I Want To Have Dinner With
Dubya
Warren Buffett
Ryne Sandberg
Alan Greenspan


Four People I am Tagging
Poot
Skippy
Everyone else has been tagged

Chicago

Well, I flew up, I ate, I drank (lots), I danced (with people wives mainly) , I partied, and I even did a little work. I stayed at the Talbot hotel, a couple blocks west of Michigan Ave and the top of the Magnificent Mile. Note to Agent, keep the Mrs. away at all cost. I recommend the digs and not because I lucked into a free room upgrade. Old school, nice, and not too expensive all things considered. I could go on and on about the trip and it was only 3.5 days. I will say one of the highlights was lunch on Sunday at Harry Caray's. It was walking distance to the hotel but most importantly to be the next best thing as he is essentially an icon and getting a trip to Wrigley in during the winter would have been tough and a little pointless other than some outside pics. Needless to say I had to order a hot dog and ice cold Budweiser. I was even wearinga white button down shirt. I didn't get any of the chili, mustard, relish, or cheese on me, which earned a ring of the bell from the barkeep. As you can see below it was a rather large dog and I loaded it out just out of principle. And when I saw Budweiser I mean it. Harry wouldn't be drinking that light stuff and neither was I. Email pics should circulate with a picture of me in action on that hotdog, or checkout my facebook gallery. It was agreat experience. Chalked full of Cubs memorabilia and soon to sport a display for the Chi-Sox success of this past fall (Harry broadcast 10 yrs for them prior to being a Cubby). A few sales people from other office were there with me and one actually recommended it prior to knowing about me beinga Cubs fan. I said hell yes and jumped onthe option needless to say. I think I was pretty much like a kid in a candy store until we finally had to report back to work meetings later that afternoon. Other details about the trip may get posted later but I had to get these two pics up and a blurb about it for those of you who catch a ride on the shortbus through Whatown every now and then.

Harry Caray's
Wha

Spicy Mustard and Relish
Wha

Helmet Time

As I have decided to run head on into the 21st century,I figure that shit better be strapped on tight. My laptop was purchased about 10 days ago and has been in my possession since this past Friday. Dell, pretty muchloaded out for any needs. Currently in the process of completing software installation. Finished it off, or so I hope, with Office tonight. I'm sure there will be a program or two at work but the major ones are on here I think. All the necessary home apps are loaded less Bit Torrent and AVG and as their uses are essentially one and the same, I don't know that I will be loading these seeing as this will be used at the office on a regular basis and logged into the network. The last great hurdle I see is getting all my email off my other computer moved to this one along with files 2 years old and less from the server and primarily C drive. All the networking stuff has been taken care and the XP Pro upgrade through Dell was a good call. Cheaper and necessary with server compatibility. The pertinents most of you are looking for: 80G, 500 MB RAM (expandable), 1.83 Ghz, 15.1" widescreen, internal wireless and ethernet, Radeon graphics card. As I add cool stuff, screw up software, or find it a handy toilet replica ala Hug-a-bunch, I'm sure you'll see it here first, especially considering I now have 3 computers that I am the primary on, though the upgrade is intended to knock out at least one of them. Of ocurse, should I really download Hooker 6.9 then I may be too dehydrated to type for a few days so if I am absent, you know why.

What's Your Password?

big boy. Please say your password. BIG BOY!


It just makes me laugh

CMS

Charlotte-Mecklenburg Schools. They are a joke. They have a bussing program that hauls kids all over town so as to bust up the natural segregation that has occured. AKA they made someone else's problems mine too. Well, mine if I had kids and couldn't afford the 10-15K /yr to stick them in private schools. Anyway, the problems here have been documented for a while and areas such as Huntersville/Lake Norman have been trying to split off and start tehre own system supported by the local taxes in that area. Smart move lake people, you all have decent cash and none of the crap if bussing goes away. And it's not like they can hold light rail over you as an incentive to come back or finishing I-77 construction to the main exits. By the way bussing is shipping kids out side their home school district not the typical way most of us got to school at some points in our life.
Anyway, the point of this is that those days may be coming to an end. The Superintendent was thrown out on their ear last election, a few board members were replaced and the bonds failed so the cash for crap has at least been slowed for a while. The best part, the new super is bringing in business people to run the show and people like Coach Joe (yes this is a board member and the name he is often referred to by) will be slowly choked back into their place instead of coddling the "minorities" who are the majority in many schools with the mass exodus of well to do's to the realm of private education. Don't be surprised if you read about the CMS turn around in 5 years or so. The town has had enough and seems to have put it's foot down on BS. Should be fun. Hopefully things will be changed for the better by the time it matters to me beyond anything other than my property taxes.

Books, Who Needs 'Em?

While many of the readers of this blog have spent some of the holiday down time enjoying various forms of literature, I have done nothing of the such. A couple investment guides have been sorted through between the flights out west and the "library" and that's about it. I prefer to spend my time blowing shit up on a computer game or indulging in a fine beverage while dumbing down in front of whatever the screen may have upon it in the living room. I find those who expose their literature findings (not the books but he profound wisdom/enlightenment/BS) to typically be somewhat pompous or arrogant. Unless of course the exposing is in my belly from some cookbook that was read. Fortunately, most of the banter is simply "I liked/disliked for reason A,B, or C." and not the arrogance. A handy tid bit of trivia answer is always appreciated in random conversation as well. With my attention span anything that can be published in hardback probably isn't going to get finished anyway, regardless of my interest in the subject, just ask my professors. Wait, no, they haven't realized I'm getting by with class attendance/participation and reading the handouts only. None the less, I have assembled a few of my favorite titles and authors for you here this evening. Raise your glass of single malt and crumpet and enjoy!

Yellow River - I.P. Freely
Under the Bleachers - Seymour Butts
Trail in the Sand - Peter Dragon
Caught on the Fence - Wong Huang Lo
Below Me, Trebek - S. Connery
Crab Shack - Poo Ti Tang
Don't Stop the Lovin' - Balou Ball

Everyone's doin' it

Yes, that's right, everyone is posting their resolutions so I better do the same.

One, quit getting so smashed on nights I get to party. Yeah it's fun for the rest of you but it's starting to hurt hte next day and I know it's not helping that bottle of Jack getting opened.
Get healthier - Yeah, everyone says this one but I have a multi prong plan that if implemented a little in each section, may work. Eat less and healthier. Cut out the late night Wendy's ( I shouldn't need the hang over rememdy quite as much anyway) . Wild Wings shouldn't be a staple of the diet. Neither should Moes or Steak Escape.
Go to the gym and do something other than run. The abs need to have some shape other than one large circle.
Be more organized, inthe office and at home. I junk off my space too much. It's even starting to bother me, I would hate to know what it does to Skippy.
Ok, Happy Hour -that's the other one, less late nights out, more happy hours to meet people. No time like the present to start that one.

It's a 10!

Number 10 hit the top shelf tonight. Thanks Nobrainer. We have 11 and 12 in the wings waiting for consupmtion and winter grilling and no traveling planned for 2 of the 3 of us. This train may be picking up some steam.

Happy New Year

Happy New Year crackas. Here's to a happy and prosperous one for all of us.

Silly People

This guy dropped the ball. His career is in the crapper now. I guess that is what one expects from someone with Wang and Suk in the same name. Next time, leave the cloning the Brits and their sheep.

Arrrggghhhh!

No, it's not the rating on the latest pirate movie. It's the sound one makes when raking in the Christmas Bounty like a true pirate. This years take includes from random to big time:
Sports bottle thing: Included a mini first aid kit, pedometer, etc from LL Bean. It was in a chic color and shape though. Think mom got confused but parts will be useful and I will use the water bottle with no shame.
Calendars and Atlas: Far Side monthly and Clemson Football Monthly. Atlas from Wally World...from talking with Skippy I won't be shopping there much more, so this should be one of the last useful things I get from the place. I should always know what day it is and where I am or am going.
Biofreeze: I plan to hit the gym harder and I am sure it will hit back. This stuff isn't over the counter and kick ass. If you have used it, you understand.
Command and Conquer Generals: Includes expansion back. When it gets cold and nasty outside. It's because I just launched a nuclear winter on some camel jockey's ass.
Card Shuffler: Screw learning the bridge. This thing can handle two decks at once. No more bent cards either.
Clemson T-shirts : Stepping up from frat club wear to alma matter wear. Go here to check out "Battleflags of the Atlantic" and "Navy T"
Dilbert book: Yes I get to go ahead and see part of my life unfold in advance now.
Clemson Hitch Cover - Orange Paw with Clemson University underneath. The Wolfpack at work get a little dose of heaven everyday now.
Weekender: It's like a wallet but for an ID, credit card and a little cash, nothing else. Will be employed this weekend.
Gift Certificates: Total Wine and Cheescake Factory. Tasty!
Shirt and Sweater- Polo, yellow button down and baby blue sweater. The Horse, sadly, matches the shirt. Can anyone point me towards the yacht club?
Shoes: Two pair of Johnstone and Murphy's. Hey, they last, fit, comfortable and I wasn't paying. One brown pair, one black ( I asked for the black) and stepmom wasn't impressed by the current shape of what I prefer for everyday wear.
Checks: they are as good as cash and already in the bank.
Aerobed with Fleece: Queen sized and the fleece doubles as a blanket or sleeping bag as it zips up. Now at least one bum and female company from ventures uptown can sleep in casa del Whapootskippy in relative comfort during JDGA events. Well, them or Agent and wife.
And the grand finale: Sony Cybersho digital Camera with 5.1 Mega pixels, carrying case, rechargable battery, and 512MB memory card. Now, if I can get it hooked into the computer I will be golden. Expect my picture output and upload to JDGA server to increase. Sucker is tiny, light, takes awesome pics thus far and realitively easy to figure out with regards to on device features such as settings, flash, etc.
The Wrap up...through Dad (who apparently had a banner year which will be paying for a large chuck of above list), stepmom, siblings, mom, grandparents, uncle and a roommate who got something though I thought we weren't doing anything, I made out like a super bandit. I am extremely priveledged. Way more than I deserved, that's for sure. I did try to give back, especially to the mom but nothing like this could I ever touch.
Now where the hell is Jeeves? I need someone to put all this stuff up and pull around the car.

Bad Liver, You must be punished.

That is what I am telling myself this week. Why bother working out when I can go home and drink as the week should be somewhat peaceful and I have no class to scurry off too. Gotta get the body primed for this weekend too. Started last night by getting back to Charlotte shortly after 8 and proceeding to drink for 5 hours before rolling into work 30 minutes late. Woo Hoo!
What I do to my liver may not matter according to this article. If this holds true, my legs will just crumble under me and I won't make it to the fridge/bar to imbibe in another Cirrhosis inducing treat. Guess I need to pick my poison and decide if that recliner with built in firdge is worth it. I think going Friends style with two recliners and mini-fridge in between would be the way to go though.

8000 Ft

The somewhat Short and Sweet of it as little was monumental.

Arrived in Denver about 8 MST sat on runway for a whole, finally deplanned and was in Vail about 3 hours later after getting luggage, finding the shuttle and making the 2+ hour drive/ride. Got to sleep around midnight (2 AM EST).
Got up on Satruday did the ski rental thing, eventually hit the slops and skied some of the best runs of the trip that afternoon. Went to dinner at an overrated Italian place. Good food but not good enough to justify the prices. Long day, short on sleep from week, hit the sack (pullout couch).
Sunday, skied afternoon again, went to dinner at Mexican place that was good on previous trip. Service sucked, food was average, I started drinking prior to dinner and kept pace right on through. Stayed out and hit The Club (owned by same crowd as Buckhead Saloons here and ATL). Met a few people from Univ of Chicago's MBA program. They organized a 100 person trip at a good rate for post exam celebration. Good to be them I guess. I went to another place for a while with a crappy comedian, then back to the Club. I forgot I was at 8000 feet and that alcohol really screws you up fast at that elevation. Made it back to the Condo without spending tons of cash or a police escort. According to fam, I came in about 4AM as older sister was up at 3:30 and said I wasn't in, and step mom said she heard me come up the steps. I remember seeing 1ish on my watch in the little sitting area down the hall. I remember waking up in said sitting areas overstuffed chair. My recollection was I got too drunk and didn't wantto go in with fam possibly still awake. Regardless, I landed in the dog house.
Monday I got up and hit the mountain with everyone else. Was fine until I ate some pizza and had a Gatorade at the lodge about 10000 ft. Elevation, sugar, grease, and a tender stomach are bad. Made a run in a back bowl with the siblings. tons of powder, crap for visibility. We didn't like it and my stomach kicked back anything liquid shortly after I topped back up and got to the lodge. I was thankful it stayed in. The bathroom attendants hate me though. Next time they will have more stalls open so the stank smell that puts you over the edge can be combatted with a place for relief other than the corne

Recipes

Well, as I taunted some of you with my cooking ability and Agent Orange is trying to one up me, I figure I would share with he and the rest of you some traditional Whatonese fair.

Sausage Balls:

One cup of Bisquick (comes in handy pouch)
One Pound of Jimmy Dean Hot Sausage
3 Cups of Shard Cheddar Cheese (I use kraft like a good kid)

Mix all this at once, thoroughly, in an oversized bowl, it makes a mess. If you have an abundance of bisquick on the outside of the large mass, you haven't mixed well enough.
Roll into quarter sized balls and place about 1" apart, or slightly less on a pre greased/Pammed cookie pan with sides (you don't want a grease fire)

Cook at 425 for 5 minutes, turn and cook and additional 5-6 minutes or until sausage appears cooked (brown)

Remove and let cool for a moment then place on several paper towels to drain the grease. Makes about 4 dozen

Recipe can be increased as you wish and according to available bowl and pans.

Pepperoni Rolls:

Sticks of pepperonni (this recipe will be based on the 4" Hormel sticks found in the prepacked lunch meat section of your local grocer).
Pillsbury Grands Biscuits (not the flaky ones)
Spray butter

Biscuits typically come 4 or 8 in a can. Make a batch accoridingly so that ingredients balance out.

Cut pepperoni into 1/6th of the stick (for other stick sizes, peice should be about 4" long and about the size of a mans thumb)
Spray both side of biscuit with butter and flatten out like you are making a mini pizza.
Wrap pepperoni with biscuit and place on a pre greased pan. Be sure to place the part where the biscuit is connect to itself down on the pan to prevent the "roll" from splitting when cooked.

Cook in pre heated oven according to the biscuit directions.



Both can be and are better reheated in the microwave. 25sec/ 5 sausage balls or one pepperoni roll.

Odds and Ends

Well, let's see. This week the following is going on:
I started one of the funnier email barages seen recently, with no parties involved being serious at first, but I think willing to fight by the end of the day.
I got reemed by my investments final (cumulative) Wed night, and am keeping my fingers crossed a B shows up in my email tomorrow or online next week.
I have been busier than a one armed cotton picker this week, since I am out of the office M-W next week. I have a big presentation tomorrow during lunch and tons of work bidding this week and next plus orders, submittal, etc as part of the daily grind.
Flying to Denver then riding on to Vail tomorrow after work, until next Wed, so I am sure no one will feel sorry for me working so hard this week. I am supposed to be packing now, obviously I am not. Prograstination at it's finest.
I have taught Skippy the ways of Caeser III and he and I are in an unspoken race to see who progresses faster. I take more turns per board but am keeping pace by being at the same promotion level. You would think the LA could whip the engineer in a development game, but I have expereince from the craze a couple years ago on my side.
Completed the overthrow of being fratastic as being cool. Ove the course of the past year, I purchased New Balance-990's, official Fratastic shoe, Rainbows, official Fratastic flops, Lacoste polo, well that one just kind fits the post frat boy look with the bankers here, and tonight capped it off while a North Face Denali fleece for my trip, official Fratastic outterwear. Yes, it is grey. No, having this clothing no longer makes anyone cool. I've gone and screwed that one up too and hope to burry it completely if Nobrainer ever steps to the plate on one of the two main components above not already filled. We can all head out to the store on Sunday' as triplets in our shoes, coats and jeans. Damn we are smooth.
Oh, and I continued to not get laid, though I will have the out of town, never see you again thing going for a few days if I venture out in the Village. Ooops, can you say jinx.
Yep, that about covers it. Had to get some stuff up and out there before the Agent catches me for delinquency.
It's really cold where I am going (I know, hot eventually, but I am talking short term) as in highs in the 20's at best, and that's at the base of the mountain. Hopefully I will return with great pictures, stories, and balls that have decided unshrivel.
Have fun for the next weekish kids!

Martha Who?

For three guys, Martha Stewart can't hold a candle to us. We have a fully decorated tree, a wreath up, a fully nativity scene, a gift or two under the tree(unwrapped of course), and Christmas tins. It may sound a little over the top but it feels more like Christmas this way, with a little hint of home. As if decorating wasn't enough, the place is pretty clean. I cooked pepperoni rolls and sausage balls. As one can imagine the comments were vulgar. Especially considering the both Poot and Skippy liked my "salty balls" and the sausage that I was handling. Poot proceeded to whip up some darn good chili and Skippy took the high road with some Toll House cookies, eating a couple in dough form but hooking us up with dessert none the less. Apparently spending several hours in the kitchen earned me bitch status and supposedly I will make for a good bitch for some woman later in life. The way I see it, I better get handy now, cause I don't see anyone lining up for the position at my side, any time soon.
Word from Poot this morning is he is sick. I draw the line on this one. Will I make a run to the store for drugs if need be? Probably. Will I throw them at him from a safe distance and quarantine his room? Yes.
Any smart remarks can be directed towards deez nuts...you know, the Planter's party mix sitting on the counter top.

WHAta Bust

Yeah, this was quite the flop weekend. Thursday went down as mentioned and held promise as a somewhat decent warmup. I think I stayed in the minor leagues warming up for next weekend though. Friday night was fun. Met a friend of Faith and Lyndsey's out, she ended up at Buckhead with us and I proceeded to monopolize her time/attention, all for not no-less. Poot probably had dibs, has the phone I know, and my apologies for not necessarily cock blocking him (don't think he was scoring on this specific night) but doing all that was necessary had it been an option. I should have hung with the two chics I did a shot with at the bar. You know, the ones that were more than happy to chat as I was dressed well from the earlier charity event, that also saw two girls, and Poot approach to take three of the four beers I had purchased and decided to bid me farewell and a fun evening without my side of the story. Dancing was fun, I was smooth for my standards but still came home to my own warm, empty bed.
Anyway, Saturday should have been Christmas in the Carribean, prior to the company Christmas party as I noted. I tuaght Paul how to play Ceasar instead and watched a couple of bowl game warm ups. The party was nice. I was dressed to the hilt again/ Atea fine dinner that didn't agree with me past the taste buds, and had afew free drinks. Drove my boss and the Asheville office manager to their homes/hotels after watching the ACC championship shocker about 1 last night. Was completely sober and felt like hell from dinner earlier.
Today, tree trimming occured about 3 laters than expected. I realized it looks like a 12 yr/o did it as I ran out of lights and all my ornaments are cars, baseball players, and trains with a few Clemson items and a few things that I am sure Skippy will introduce upon his return relegating my childish ornaments to the scarecly populated back of the tree. Drank my fair share of Rum and Coke and listened to a lot of Buffett while realizing his old stuff is better but I lost half of it. It's quarter of 12, I'm hardly tired and my buzz is running down the drain with the rain.
I hope you all had a more productive weekend. I shouldn't complain, many others had more important things go south I am sure. I got lots of sleep, did nothing mentally stressing, and my biggest frustration is Clemson is going to higher paying bowl than the one in town, I can't attend, and the option isn't the Peach in Atlanta. Oh well, time to suck it up, get through the week and hope for the best next weekend, it'll be the last shot in '05 to rock it out I guess as the others weekends are spoken for and New Years just became much less anticipated.

Back Online

Whatown, from the the friendly confines of The Springs is back up and running. Feel free to send me links to all the cool crap like torrents, etc so I can reload,

4 Day Bender?

Maybe...Last night got off to a weak start compared to what most of you are thinking when I mention the word bender. That's okay though, I was just prepping the liver. Hit up a couple bars downtown with Ashley her roommate and Poot. I had received a rather high grade, all but securing a B regardless of my comprehensive final performance, in one of my two classes for the semester. An A is pretty unattainable due to large amount of info the test will be over, so it was time to celebrate a little.
Also, my XP disk finally arrived in my room. No thanks to the dumbasses at the front office who have held it for god knows how long. I called from lunch yesterday to see if it had arrived. Tiger Direct said it had been shipped for over five days, no notice, no package. It USED to be common place that UPS drops said packages at front office, notice left on your door or in mail, you go pick up package. Dummy on the phone yesterday though they got delivered, I told her to go check and low and behold,they had it...morons. I digress and back to the weekend plan, where this fits in.
Tonight, Toys for Tots at Southend Brewery. I have made sure all 5 females I know in town are aware this is taking place and hopefully attending so I can feel good about myself and actually talk to women at it this year. It also helps for other women to see that you aren't just a couple scary guys standing around stalking. It may or may not be correct, but I am trying to help Poot and myself out a little. I will be loading said program and enjoying some Jack during pre-preparty, then attending a preparty about 7:30, and on to the shin dig around 9.
Tomorrow, football all day and it should have been Christmas in the Caribbean in the apt but I am holding that for Sunday. 7ish is the company Christmas Party that I will be attending stag. I could have taken a date but as it would have been a friend only thing, the 20 question game with all the wives and office people wouldn't be worth it. Plus I am a lot more likely to get a little help should said women know any females floating around single in the age bracket than I would have with some form of date. Downtown should follow said affair (which is at McCormick and Schmicks no less).
Sunday will be Christams in the Carribean. Open the door, hope its warm, put football on mute, crank the Buffett CD's and decorate the apartment. All commers are welcome as long as they bring their favorite rum drink. rum and Coke is recommended but we daquiri mix left over from the 4th of July. This is typically on the day of the xmas party (at least the first edition was last year) but has been moved by request.
So in summary, I should be back online at home this weekend. I plan to do a lot of drinking. I am decorating the apartment this weekend and we have social events to attend. I am sure a decent stroy of me being drunk, saying something off color, or screwing something up will occur. Stay tuned, Clark Griswol may be in action.

Eat, Sleep, Repeat

Throw in some football, a little family time and decorating for Christmas, and you have my holiday weekend. Back to the gym to counteract some of the eating but it will probably be a losing battle for the next month. All in all, you just can't beat the relaxation part of it, well one or two things could, but they don't fit the theme of this post.

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving folks. My online time will be limited until next week so look for a recap of any stupidity and gorging then. Otherwise I may have a comment or two floating on other sites but don't expect much more. Check out The Sporting Gnomes for all important Clemson sporting info (aka Football Bowl Stuff) over the weekend as I am sure the other contributors will be on.

I've Become Boring

Well, I've looked back and though I have had a decent time in the past month, it's not reflective in my posts outside the train wreck that was me this past weekend. Not to fear though, things may get interesting in the not so distant future. With the game this weekend I think we are going to plan some trouble in Charlotte, who knows, but you'll read it here first. Second, there are lots of social events planned for the holiday season that I am sure we will blow cash on and attend. If nothing else, some good laughs should surface from my attempts and getting shot down, or from being a candy ass and just standing around. I will be traveling out west for part of a week to ski the week prior to Christmas. You'll have to live without me but I am sure something will happen but don't expect fireworks from it. New Years always holds possibilities, reference last years post and throw in a possible Clemson bowl bid to the Queen City. Who knows what else is coming. I have three tests left and will be done with class for a month or so come the second week in December. The spring is also showing some potential as I am signed up for an easy, and all uptown (Thursday night trouble) class load in my last full semester. Basically I am bored at work right now posting this and putting off making my formula sheet for tonight. Hopefully for you, the reader, things get spiced up. We may even find a reason to have everyone to town and pop the cork on a certain bottle of smooth bottle of the good stuff.

Tee Oh Double Trainwreck.

Well, this is what I remember:
Friday night, I had a few with the Rochmanfords, got cornered by the ex, let my inner monologue answer for me out loud and made an ass of myself to prevent getting what I was assuming to be cornered in a booth. I followed this up with hitting on some girl named Ashley that was in TTT with a an engineer I call on here in Charlotte, and his wife. During conversation, I got invited back to the Lake Hartwell Inn but with an early morning and knowing everyone would be in town the next night, I decided to test my luck with said girl the next night, mistake.
Saturday started fine. I got much more of a buzz than anticipated pregame. I didn’t do anything completely stupid and was working on being nothing much more than entertainment. Even got a little beer pong in with some younger frat clubbers and showed I could still hang, or so I thought. First quarter went great. Second quarter I got frustrated and left at the half. I was yelling overly loud to “smash their faces in.” With families in front of us, it was best I not come back. I though FSU would roll on us anyway after the 2nd quarter so I stayed out at the tailgate with Kiwi and listened on the radio while resting peacefully. 4 hours sleep Friday wasn’t cutting it after a long week coupled with early morning alcohol. Post game rolled around and I thought it good to celebrate our big win. Mistake #2. Once the short bus pulled out of the station (aka getting out of said chair) a train wreck was inevitable. I know lots of hard core drinking was involved. I think I commandeered a beer pong slot, and hit on some 18 yr/o for a very long time. I turned up a bottle of Jack, then about spit half of it out, leaving a slober string about 2 ft long between my mouth and the ground. I didn’t know what was coming out of which hole at that point. Everyone around me backed off as they were afraid of the same. Memories are blurry for awhile after that. I ended up at Peppinoes where I filled a coke cup full of whatever I had consumer previously. I don’t think I was eating at that point and had my fill of the day. Drinking had been haulted and I wanted nothing more than to be sober again. Bouts of extreme tiredness lingered as I worked on being sober. A bouncer at TTT once asked me to raise my head from a counter or I would have to leave. I promptly raised said head. I though I had gotten a 4th wind at some point, but I was wrong and that energy quickly faded. Around midnight I made it back to the car and sat there zoned out and trying to snooze a moment or two. Driving home wasn’t hard with regards to drunkenness, I was however struggling to keep my eyes open as I was shot. Made it back to the house only to get confused about which house I was staying at. I entered the wrong persons side garage door and promptly noted “this is wrong”. I though I had beat everyone home thoroughly as Russ had given me the code to get inside, which I strangely still remember. I spent some more time in the car until I got cold, walked down the street and realized they were all home all of about 50 yards away (2 doors down). I marched in once Russ saw me milling around, explained that I was but wasn’t lost and went right to bed which is all I had cared to do for the past 2 hours.
Things to note: Drinking is fun, but I am too old to try and pull it off for double digit hours without water or Gatorade being mixed in anything stiffer than light beer.
Being a train wreck used to be funny but now is somewhat embarrassing. I’m just glad most of the people I will see in the next 8 months from the outting already expect this from me at some point or another.
If we all get together for New Years or a bowl game, I owe rides, food, a place to stay or extreme amounts of gratitude to too many people to list. Most of you know who you are. Next time we all get together, make me stop or remind me of this weekend. It doesn’t need to happen again.

Oh yeah, I don’t think I saw that Ashley girl again, if so, I am sure she had come to her senses. The Gentlemen Jack remains sealed.

Emails from Kingsport

The following two emails were receivied back to back this morning. I find each amusing in it's own way.

Email 1: (Forward)

CANBERRA: Muslims who want to live under Islamic
Sharia law were told on Wednesday to get out of
Australia, as the government targeted radicals in a
bid to head off potential terror attacks. A day
after a group of mainstream Muslim leaders pledged
loyalty to Australia at a special meeting with Prime
Minister John Howard, he and his ministers made it
clear that extremists would face a crackdown.
Treasurer Peter Costello, seen as heir apparent to
Howard, hinted that some radical clerics could be
asked to leave the country if they did not accept
that Australia was a secular state and its laws were
made by parliament. "If those are not your values,
if you want a country which has Sharia law or a
theocratic state, then Australia is not for you," he
said on national television. "I'd be saying to
clerics who are teaching that there are two laws
governing people in Australia, one the Australian
law and another the Islamic law, that this is false.
If you can't agree with parliamentary law,
independent courts, democracy, and would prefer
Sharia law and have the opportunity to go to another
country which practices it, perhaps, then, that's a
better option," Costello said. Asked whether he
meant radical clerics would be forced to leave, he
said those with dual citizenship could possibly be
asked move to the other country.
Education Minister Brendan Nelson later told
reporters that Muslims who did not want to accept
local values should "clear off". "Basically, people
who don't want to be Australians, and they don't
want to live by Australian values and understand
them, well then they can basically clear off," he
said. Separately, Howard angered some Australian
Muslims on Wednesday by saying he supported spies
monitoring the nation's mosques.

AMERICANS..... ARE YOU LISTENING?
and Reading?


amen and preach on


Email 2:

Subject: FW: Drink Order


A pompous minister was seated next to a hillbilly on a flight across the country. After the plane was airborne, drink orders were taken.
The hillbilly asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him.

The flight attendant then asked the minister if he would like a drink.
He replied in disgust, "I'd rather be savagely raped by brazen whores than let liquor touch these lips."

The hillbilly then handed his drink back to the flight attendant and said, "Shit, me too. I didn't know we got a choice."


That's just funny, I don't care who you are.


And that concludes today's email postings.

Hooters

Message on the placard below the Hooters sign on South Blvd: "Now Hiring Ex-Panther Cheerleaders"

I now have a craving for so-so greasy wings.

That is all.

Charlotte Tax Dollars at Work

So I attended by first Bobcat's Game in the new arena, aptly named Charlotte Bobcat’s Arena. I must say that it was quite impressive. Unlike the old arena it is very vertical in design with regards to the seating. Had I been in the upper deck last year for a game I would have needed the binoculars the old lady down low was using. Anyway, it was very ornate inside and the mechanical system is massive. I am actually somewhat proud to say that some of the equipment on the job was provided by manufactures I rep, unfortunately it was provided through another firm as the work was done by a contractor out of Detroit. Of the few here that would have been capable of such a large scale job was already committed to another one of my favorite Charlotte Municipal job, the New County Courthouse. Lots of artistic stuff inside, an absolutely incredible scoreboard that features a model of the Charlotte skyline around the top which is back by some mood lighting for a day or night background. The screens were very crisp and the video boards and graphics throughout are quite impressive. It also helps that close ups of cheerleaders were that much better because of it. At least these girls weren’t going at it (in more ways than one) in the restroom, unlike our Panther Cheer squad in Tampa, but I digress. Anyway, the Bobcat’s won their home opener but couldn’t pull it out last night against the Jazz while Poot and I attended. I just hope the team improves with the UNC player recruitment to keep the attendance up. We weren’t at half capacity last night, not bad for a lower tier team on a Monday but makes people wonder if the “investment” was worth the cost. The old place filled up with concerts when they came through anyway. Until they fill more nights with activities past minor league hockey, basketball and the events that had no attendance issues to begin with, I’m going to fill a bit slighted helping foot the bill and the operation cost.

Perspective

The following came from my investmenets professor after our quick current events discussion led to a topic concerning GDP's, etc.
In your face, world.


If we could shrink the earth's population to a village of precisely 100 people, will all existing human rations remaining the same, ti would look like this:

57 Asians, 21 Europeans, 14 North/South Americans, 8 Africans
51 Female, 49 Male
70 Nonwhite, 30 White
70 Non-Christian, 30 Christian
80 would live in substandard housing
70 would be unable to read
50 would suffer from malnutrition
1 would be near death, 1 near birth
1 would have a college education
No one would have a computer
6 would control over half of the entire world's wealth those 6 would be U.S. citizens.

Cha cha changes

Thanks go out to Nobrianer and Agent Orange for the new header. Orange was the arteeste and Nobrianer got it posted properly. You may see some other changes but don't bet on it until I either get a computer at home that works or the semester break and I have nothing else to do. Most of you will get a kick out of this, at least I hope so. I will take credit for the pick and the change in title but nothing else.

Hey Norm!

Yes folks, Harry was back. The costume was a bit modified, the drunk was not nearly as severe, and he made his way home, sober. As you can see from the link below, Mac caught him in action, mustard stain and all. Due to the fact the bars were beyond packed, thought I had a bit more cash on me when heading down town and the fact I didn’t want to deal with running a tab, I shut the alcohol train down around midnight or 12:30 (prior to time change). By the time we got everyone to the car it was 3 (2 with time change, I guess). I was even responsible for getting our extremely drunk friend out of the bar as she couldn’t stand up. She was barely dressed in our costume so I looked either like the best friend she could have or someone getting ready to commit a very foul crime. Keeping her from falling in her own pineapple and vodka volcano and turning my head while she popped a squat put me in good friend zone for sure. Poot was around to help (that’s him in the Hank Jr. outfit next to me). He was trying to help the other chic find her phone while I tended to the drunk. By the way, these are the same two girls from last weekend and they came by to hang out Friday while Poot and I laid into half a handle of JD and sketched the face onto the wicked pumpkin I carved. The other did kind of piss us off late night as she was all up on A.D.D. boy. Not that we cared she wanted someone other than Poot or I but this guy is just a straight dumbass and I won’t go into that any further. As mentioned, Mac was there to partake late after his journey through some Haunted Forrest. He was dressed as the Donnie something or another, Beaver Hunter from the Bob and Tom Show, I swear to god he was. It was a pretty fun weekend. Nothing super fantastic but not nearly as expensive as the butt whipping in Atlanta would have been. See The Sporting Gnome on the sidebar for Bowman’s thoughts on that.

http://teamtweek.textamerica.com/?r=3571148

Oh, and the Jack poster in the background no longer hangs on that wall. It’s not in our possession at the moment but we do know where it is.

I am a Leader

In being a big fat blog dork. I was originally going to get on here to rant about something related to Nobrainer's blog concerning the government and big business and the political bandwagons. You know, blogs are a political thing, or so my boss thought until I enlightened him a couple months ago. Becuase ranting about the above is dorky enough. Then I decided to venture outside Nobrainer Inc. and see what others were writing. Agent Orange updated yesterday and last Thursday. Not bad. He has something on the Sporting Gnome pages too. The sad part is half his college readership isn't getting redirected to the updated material automatically and are reading his "I'm moving post." Funk is doing a good job of keeping up after a few slumps in late summer. Poot has crapped out since his Boobies jaunt (granted he was gone for a while) . The Stinky Recluse never really got going. Nobrianer, is well Nobrianer. The kid gets mucho linked to other sites and is in grad school. What else is he going to do other than head south to drink with the JDGA? Jessie's Jungle...yeah if you call a cemetary a jungle. Skippy looks to haverealized he is too cool and moved on from his IBO (Inital Blog Offering for anyone looking for a copyright). Malph is lagging too. Half my readers don't even have sites. I shouldn't really count Orange's new monologue either. Shut down the old one or build an auto redirect damn it.
Basically what I am getting at is that, no matter how useless most of my crap is, I have made it through one year of posting as of yesterday. The last 7 weeks have been without home PC (save the "Do work while at work, Wha" comments and I have been able to hold my own and bring a little humor to most of you crackheads, while holding steady at multiple postings a week if nota couple on any given day. And I'm a contributor to another page which is taking much of my sports knowledge. I am doing a pretty damn good job I think. Now, let's go home and pour a tall stiff one, put on the helmet, break out the Harray Carry gear for the weekend, celebrate my blog dorkiness, and say in unison

YAAAAAAY WHA!

Someone fill me in

So as most of you probably know from Nobrianer Inc. thing didn't go my way on Saturday night. I even got cold shouldered, or so it seemed Sunday. This is the part I didn't quite understand. They knew I was chilling by myself and invited me to come hang out. Get there and I see it was only Jay and the girls. Two boys, two girls, sounds like a properly devised plan from highschool. I don't know. Girl two stayed covered in a blanket curled up on a one person chase lounger that was sepearted from the couch. This went on for two hours. After the shows, I took off and headed home. Little conversation was had and I didn't have to deal with A.D.D. guy or any other random dudes. I think I need to revert back to July mentallity. Fun girls, good to hang out and party every now and then, no interest past that, and go on. Oh well, I didn't have any real expectations but I did screw up part Nobrianers weekend and possibly messed up an Asian persuasion weekend.

Today Sucks Ass Tater

Okay, so it's almost lunch and the shit storm of the world has descended upon me. I have previously mentioned test tonight. No big deal. I am leaving here around 4:30 to head towards class, meet a classmate to finalize our note sheets and wear out the test. Two days ago this was my largest headache. Not anymore. Yesterday afternoon I was informed that I needed to attend a meeting with city facility people, and Carrier who purchased some equipment from the company before I was solely handling the account with them. Well, enter the meeting at 9AM and find out that the past two months of fixing a quality problem with said equipment has gone nowhere and if anything has actually created more problems. I have inherited this thing I guess and will be fixing it. They are helping pay my bills in a big way, guess I have to get my hands dirty at some point though I have had nothing to do with the screw ups of the past 2-3 months. Enter me TRYING to leave the meeting site. I get in my car turn the key and get a whole lotta nothin. A little clicking sound indicating my starter works but that's it. Being that I am slightly above the average army mule intelligence wise, I turned off any and all electrical devices in the car and try to re-crank. Nothing as I figured it would be. Remember, I drove the same said vehicle to this site an hour earlier. It's not wanted to crank well for a week or so but not been a major problem and the voltmeter was hovering close enough to center to not overly concern me. Charlie came to get me/jump the car off and still nothing. I gotta couple hundred bucks riding on a new alternator and another 65 on the tow to the dealership. Fortunately the towing company and dealership are relatively close to where I was and where I work. Now if I can get my car back in time to head to University this evening I will be in good shape. On a brighter note, I can't get called out of the office now so maybe I will get some work done. Nah- the shit storm will continue to rain. At this point I am just hoping the JD supply is refurbished when I finally get home in whatever fashion that may be and that the size of the next turd that hit's me isn't so big.


Addnenum 1 (2:45): I just found out that the alternator is fine. Thank goodness I took it to the dealership and not Joe Bob's fix it quick, as they actually checked the peice first. It was the battery, which makes me feel a little better but more of a fool. I was not aware that a battery could go form being able to start your car without problem to not having the juice to play your radio in an hours time. And the lights are on an auto sensor so they were off as well. Who knew? I didn't and hopefully my bank account won't notice as much now either.

Demo-craps and my favorite shows

Okay, so the apartment had an epiphany last night. As you know, ABC has wedged in this crap drama called “Commander in Chief” about Jenna Davis becoming President, blah, blah, blah. It’s not the show so much that gets me as the time slot. They put this liberal filth right after mindless redneck comedies such as “According to Jim” and “Rodney.” These shows serve their purpose well, giving me a good chuckle or two as I prepare/eat dinner. Next falls this liberal crap which we have decide is being used simply to dumb America down more for the Hillary ’08 push that will ensue in t-minus, no, wait, 2 days after Bush’s re-election, that already lifted off. Here it what I know about the show. It’s unrealistic, Donald Sutherland’s character doesn’t think she should continue in her position. Kudos to the character. Boo for him being involved in this crap. I expected nothing less of Ms Davis. Anyway, by sliding this in, the typical American knucklehead is exposed to this attempt to desensitize before their nerves can twitch quick enough to what ever channel your NBC affiliate runs on to catch more redneck humor with “My Name is Earl.” Even those who make conscience attempts to avoid this brainwashing end up being somewhat exposed. If not from the previews that run during every major ABC program commercial break and intro to the show but to the last few minutes and previews of next weeks episode after we have switched back to ABC for “Boston Legal,” one of the finer shows currently airing, if not the funniest. Now, I salute ABC for their new line of shows over the past year or so. This garbage is getting good reviews and ratings (Thanks liberal media who are behind this plot!) but “Desperate Housewives” and the aforementioned Legal hold their own and I make time to watch them. I find humor in “Grey’s Anatomy” and enjoy Katherine Heigl’s scenes especially. “Lost” seems to get great reviews, an Emmy, and has a large following of people as well, though I have never really been into it. Note, all these shows have plots and are not of the reality genre. Good for them. My only problem is why did ABC have to screw with the rotation. Housewives and Legal were a slam dunk for locking people into the Sunday night spot. I think most watch the redneck comedy regardless. I know Grey’s came on strong Sunday’s in the Legal time spot, and Legal could hold it’s own anywhere else on the schedule, especially in a typically weak Tuesday night spot. Why though, did they have to put this commander crap in I ask, why?! I’ll tell you this. It wasn’t to lock up Tuesday’s as obviously with the addition of Legal they were getting the intellectual, late adult crowd and had the average Joe families already locked up in primetime. It’s simply a ploy to get he public used to idea of a woman President, I.E. Hillary. Easily attempted considering they are exposing two typically different demographics, with a wide range of political affiliation (working class, conservative, and upper crust across the board) to this theme and that it is ok. Disclaimer time: Now, if a female candidate comes along in the next 25 years and they are the best candidate (Mrs. Rice) I may vote for them, especially based on where they stand on issues, and if they run as the lead candidate. This seems like too much of a setup though with the VP stepping into office, ala what we see coming with Senator I can’t keep my husband, the former President, happy. Ok, so I have plugged my favorite shows, got that little bit of frustration off my chest, and exposed the liberal subplot. I feel better.

710 Miles

That was the grand total from pulling out of the office Thursday morning, headed for Raleigh until I pulled back in the same space yesterday morning. Over 12 hours of solitude on the road. I can't complain. The trade show in Raleigh was worth while. The game was sloppy but had the outcome I was looking for as a pleasant change. Got home at a reasonable hour on Friday and watched my high school but it one of the highschools truly in the mountains. Did morethan my share of yard work on Saturday. Had a good dinner (and got left overs to bring back) that night while vegging out infront of college football/race/MLB playoffs. Lunch with dad and fam on Sunday then the journey home which was culminated in a game of poker and a couple games of billiards. Fortunately, with 2 rebuys, I only lsot 10 bucks. Guess that's what happens when the BS shots mix in with a decent game and your original buy-in ends up being free. I am still tired and a test is coming on Thursday along with the retrun of the punishing test from two weeks ago, tomorrow. The middle of the week isn't looking so hot but things could turn around...I hope.

Rock Star

Poot and I wore it out last night. Had dinner partially funded by old gift certificates last night. Can't beat the Rockhampton Ribeye at Outback. Headed home to let things settle a bit and get hte ball rolling with a Jack and Coke (needed the caffenice to prevent food coma) then headed down town. Hit Phil's for a minute to grab my credit card from Thursday night and check out their hotass bartenders. Struck up a little conversation with a very cute FSU alum who was trying to see what their score had been earlier. Nothing of any substance came of it but I definetly pulled a Wha and dropped the ball on getting a phone number, especially considering she made a point to say it was very nice to meet me, blah blah blah, on her way out. Moved on to Dixie's and met up with a couple we know that had called earlier in the evening. They had a smokin hot friend with them too. Great scenery and we drank and partied for the next 3-4 hours at Dixies and Buckhead. One of the most fun nights on the town in quite a while. They cockblock Poot with an other chic at Buckhead though, not cool. the best part was they aren't afraid of a little ass grabbing bandit and even turn it around on you. Good Times! This morning was little rough but a couple advils, lunch, water, and a coke took care of all that. Now I'm in the office tying up last weeks loose ends and trying to get things in line for this week so I can get out of town for the NC State game and a weekend with the fam in TN.

For your weekend laughing pleasure. Let it be noted that though I am fully responsible for this post being up I did not create the image nor did I have anything to do with any of the characters having likenesses to people real or fake. It is just damn funny material.  

It's Over..Kinda

Well, I took it from that Investments test Wednesday. I haven't taken it from a test like that since Fluids or Strengths but oh well, the rectum is beginning to heal nicely. Yesterday sucked. Why do crappy ass storm systems move into town the one day I need it to be nice outside during work. The weather sucks, no one like to go out in that and henceforth a ton of tie and effort for atrade show was sent down the strom drain, literally. Now it's pitched a friggin tent and setup shop over this area all weekend. Another last ditch chance to go to the lake, foiled again. At least I get to sit on my butt all weekend and do nothing....well, other than get piss drunk downtown for the first time in forever. I just hope the voicemails I am abotu to check don't suck to bad. The email from the past two days weren't too rough, so I got that going for me.

One of those days

You ever have one of those days when you wake up with a sick to your stomache feeling? Just praying you can get through all the things to do at work and otherwise, without letting anyone down or screwing your self over with a poor performance in one of them. Yeah, that's today and tomorrow.

I Suck

This is the general concensus on me this week. Apparently one is supposed to be able to grill in the dark on a relatively new grill, and everything be perfect. I am also supposed to clean up stuff regardless of if I got it out. Whatever happened to the cook doesn't clean rule? Yeah, and I guess I am terrible becuase I bitch about insurance companies who are trying to mail statements to an address that is two years, and three locations old. Sorry I wasn't in the best mood after a 14 hour day when I read the general stupiditiy placed in front of me. And to try and hold off a solid five minutes before talking any form of shit doesn't cut it. Don't fake being nice or giving me a chance to unwind...if you are going to bitch, type it up and place it on a note on the door so I know what I am walking in to, though it is expected these days. Beforwarned though, go ahead and get prepared for the not so gracious response you are about to receive. If I choose to eat dinner in my room and watch a different program than what has been commandeered to the living room...let it go instead of making smart ass remarks that you may think I can't hear just because I don't respond. You probably don't want my small talk anyway. I've been nice and rather accomodating and it's pretty much up. Some shit is going tochange and if people don't like it, there isn't much they are going to be able to do unless they hole up in their own rooms orlearn to cope. When people have shitty weeks and lots of stress, give them some space and let some shit slide. It's not because they think they are any better and don't have to do things, it's because, quite frankely, the piddly shit you have been dwelling on at the gym or while you have been sitting on your ass the last 3 hours is so far down the priority list that it might be seen next week. If what ever your little issue may be, is so important, then handle it so you don't have to cope. Otherwise let it go and hope the favor will be returned when positions are reversed. Constant harping will do nothing but bite you in the ass later.

Quality Music

The new Coldplay song "Fix You" is awesome. I will have to give "props" to Skippy for pointing this song out to me earlier this summer after the album had been released. I'm glad to hear it on the radio as the slackasses I live with haven't burned me a copy of the CD yet.

One of my Favorites

The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. Its been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt, and erased again. But, baseball has marked the time. This field, this game, is a part of our past, Ray. It reminds us of all that once was good, and could be again.

Total Frustration

The past two weeks have brought us back to a place that many Tiger fans would have been happy to see a month ago. Coming out of one of the more grueling opening month schedules in D-1 with a 2-2 record. That is fine, but my frustration lies in how we got there. Open the year with a heart stopping performance in the final seconds to overcome a 4th quarter deficit in front of a raucous crowd at home. Good job Tigers 1-0.
Next, we go on the road to a typically well coached MD team, and without the aid of the crowd, pull out another 4th quarter comeback and show the folks at ESPN, hey, we don’t have to be at home to win a close one, especially being on TV. 2-0, we have a little momentum now.
Week 3, “The U” comes to Death Valley for the first time and experiences a rumble and shake that I haven’t heard even at past USuCk and FSU games in the Valley. A heartbreaking loss but with all the same heroics as the previous games including a 4th quarter comeback. Some streaks, such as OT wins, are just meant to be broken. 2-1 (and not a shabby 1) still looking good. Tweak out a few errors and we may really have something.
Week 4, what the hell happened to us? This is one of the poorest all around efforts I have seen in a while. Granted, expecting to come out of the stretch at 3-1, which many people started doing after A&M, was a little over zealous but hey, think positive. My problem begins with the coaching staff this week though. It’s like we jumped in a Delorian and went back to Tommy West football a-la 1997. What happened to our offense? Running between the tackles with 9 men in the box? I don’t care how good Merriweather and Davis have looked, it ain’t gonna work folks. Running 3 yard routes on 3rd and 6…..um, I think I know why we didn’t convert ANY of them. It just looked like the coaches were the ones still asleep this game. Oh, and we threw one pass longer than 15-20 yards. Too bad WE COMPLETED IT AGAINST SINGLE COVERAGE THAT WAS THERE ALL DAY! We won’t talk about clock management just before the half, when 25 yards puts us in J. Dean range and we do nothing to go at it. The coaches can say all they want about missed assignments and the like. It happens, but don’t go pushing the blame on them because you didn’t have enough intestinal fortitude to challenge them to make a decent play. I can’t say enough about the defensive play. The coaching here was lacking as well, the players did there job for the most part. Why do we have coverage playing 12 yards off the line on 3rd and 4 for the other team. Do we like giving them the first down? I was somewhat unimpressed by our tackling as well. You aren’t going to arm tackle D-1 running backs, especially when everyone is soaking wet in 90 degree heat and a little on the slippery side. To give up only 10 points, all early to boot, though is quite an achievement. Too bad they spent well over 10 minutes longer in the field than the opposition’s D. And my final frustration…the crowd. Have you not noticed the D thrives on your noise? You could have conducted Sunday morning service in their half the game. I saw more empty lower deck seats than I care to admit as well. It was hot, yes. We gave a lot last week, yes. Do you lay down and be quiet just because the coaches are dropping the ball? NO! Get fired up, and be the teams motivation when those in charge aren’t getting it done.
Here’s hoping we go to Winston, put it on the Deamon Deacons like a top notch football team should and that a few fans (I know there are plenty of alums in NC, SC, and VA all within three hours) make the trip get behind our guys. We can get this thing rolling again and run through the rest of the conference schedule and see where it puts us. We may come out on the other end quite surprised.

Fore

The JD count quietly broke four last night with a junior also on the shelf. We still have a good two weeks before the three month mark hits, and this is a slow time in the aprt as we spend the weekdays recovering from weekends out of town. If this pace can be held through October (several road trips planned), watch for an explosion when the weather cools and the traveling decreases.

Just in case

DEEEEEEEEZ NUTS! DEEZ NUTS! DEEZ NUTS! Thought y'all may have been missing your recent dosage. That is all.

Hoarse and Sunburnt

These are the two most evident repercussions I have to show after this weekend. What was going to be a simple day trip for what was expected to be a great game became a full blown party and weekend to remember. After a couple beers and a phone call by Poot to find out what is tailgating food assignment was, we made a not-to-hard decision to pack up and take off. Free lodging was available and for a game like this, we were crazy not to take up the offer. Clemson arrival time of 9:30 in the downtown parking garage…what a great addition to the town. TTT wasn’t quite what I was expecting but I still ran into a few people I knew. The usual crowd had a various reasons for not being there…it is starting to get obvious we are getting old. Hard partying the night before a game is becoming less and less of a priority, even for me, as this wasn’t even planned. Hada good time, got some sleep and was in the back of Agent Orange’s cousins ride by 10AM. Tailgating officially started around 11 as we had to get the coordination down with the location holder. Grabbed a beer at the Esso before hand. I like the changes though I didn’t realize that had been done for so long. 3:30 rolls around and I was part of the 80+ ready to rock and roll. GREAT GAME. Too bad the Tigers didn’t come out on top. I’ll take the game though. Anytime you perform like that, have your facilities and crowd displayed for the entire nation and put up the fight we did against a widely recognized national power, you can’t complain. It should also keep us from getting the big head for the next two weeks as the schedule doesn’t exactly weaken too much. Post game was a cluster. TTT was dead. Bummed a ride to Esso with Poot, stayed there and ran into a fair amount of folks I knew. Good times though I didn’t get to see my new favorite bartender in Clemson. Oh well. Yesterday was all recovery and the voice is still in and out this morning. I am also on a steady diet of Advil, water, and aloe lotion. It was fun but damn I hurt. Forth football season as a grad. Getting old sucks.

Diplomas

I am officially rewarding two degrees today. They are each a B.S. in Hortoneese (trust me, it is a fine science, not an art). Mr. Bradley T. Rochford (Asshead or Agent Orange) and Mr. Michael E. Oberg (Poot) are receiving these diplomas in recognition of their outstanding skills in interpretation and translation. One day, I hope they take these honors and begin the education of others at a higher level. Once the Wha Center for Appalachian-American Speech is open, they will receive their directors positions if they so choose to accept the challenge of educating others. Congratulations Gentlemen.

Also, apologies go out to Agent Orange as he earned his degree years ago but it wouldn't be right to allow him to graduate early or on time, or through any respectable medium outside a blog or hot dog stand.

Disaster Relief

To all those people who feel that it is their duty to speak out against the govenment and the efforts that have been made to aid those in need, do me one favor. Before landblasting the current administrations, please do the following: First, disclose the amount of funds, relief aids, etc, that you have donated or peronsally raised for the efforts. Second, think about what good your comments are really making? Are they getting anything done? Probably not, well at least nothing more than creating another headache, and question to take time to answer, when the folks in charge already have plenty to do. Third, remember that most of the dingbats were given a weeks notice to get out. If you were so concerned about them, why didn't you go pull them out BEFOREHAND? Forth, if the government is so poorly run, why don't you run for office and try to fix it. Oh that's right. You have, and those with more than half a brain voted to make sure you didn't get in. Now go back to these churches you are supposedly reverends at, assuming you can find them, and do something good....like gather donations of food, water, and clothing instead of TV cameras and liberal reporters.

Assistance Please

This is a serious and urgent post. I have spent parts of each day this weekend dicking around with my computer, at least between football games when Iw as supposed to be using it for strudious purposes. It seems that in rebooting it to pick up our wireless network some files went misplaced and it wouldn't even reboot. I have tried repairing it from my origianl XP disk but nothing seems to owrk. Even last night, I told it to reformat the drive and reinstall. I don't have the equipment to pull it off apparently. Now I need you, the residents of Whatown's help. Anyone with an XP disk please hook me up. I have my old code, and even Service Pack 1 on a seperate disk, but my regular bootup doesn't seem to have what I need anymore. I gotta get this thing running or my grad school groups are going to thoroughly dislike me. Let me know what can be done. I will try and get one from the office as I do have the code as mentioned but it doesn't look so good on that horizon right now.

And the Winner Is...

Bowman....I have to give it to you Brad, the best one yet and fits my procrastination style well. Heismann just doesn't roll off the tongue so well. For your efforts you win (drum roll) well I don't know yet but plan on bringing a decent cup to drink it from this weekend.

The Roaming Gnome

Well, my traveling gnome has taken up shop on the mantle. He hasn't even received groans from architecture boy. The orange has something to do with it and we have all this random other stuff in a collage up there so he kinda blends in I guess. I plan to take him to games as once you bring a gnome ot a game, and hte Tigers win, they must return until the streak is broken. I will be wearing the same shirt as well, so be prepared. Back to the gnome though. He needs a cool name. I like the idea of searching through some old historic names realted to Clemson. Frat Club names are welcome for the lamb chop readers out there but I think the Clemson idea is better. I may call him Heismann...the inner jock coming out maybe? R.C. wouldn't be bad either as Death Valley would be reminiscent of N'awlins' without him (no offense to those in the trajedy meant). I am open for suggestions though. It's kinda like naming a dog, but having a reason other than "it sounds cool." As soon as I get a digital camera to track his journeys he will be traveling with me. (Mom, Dad, Santa Clause, are you listening?) I aim to have a Quarterly picture block in Clemson World at some point where the travels of Clemson Gnomes are featured just as IPTAY handkerchiefs are displayed in the O&W. Anyway, give me a hand, I may even award the winner, and we all know what one of my favorite incentivisors is, if anyone can beat the two listed above.

Damn It

First we lose John Denver, great musician, to a plane crash. This was several years ago as most of you know. Now the only other Denver worth a crap has left us as well. Bob Denver (Gilligan from Gilligan's Island) passed away today at 70. That sucks!

Good Stuff

I would post a long blog about this weekend but you, the readership, were all there and playing along. I styaed "on my feet" so to speak as opposed to last year so I remember pretty much everythign that went on. I hope everyone else had as good a time as I did. Somethign funny happen that I just wasn't around for (like sinking the dock with all of 4 people)? Post it so we can all laugh and laugh.

Proverbs 26:11

As a dog returns to it's vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.

On a roll tonight

Three things:
An executive decision has been made that I will not be pulling a boat to Clemson at $3 a gallon. We have a dock, a cove and I will bring things for people to float on and a football. No point bringing something that will cost me an additional $50 bucks just so we can float above water in the middle of the same cove. We aren't even staying close to campus with regards to the part of the lake and I have no clue where the nearest public access landing is. That's a round at the Walker course and much less hassle!
I have now fully come to the realization that Ron White's comedy can be applied to most any situation or conversation about stupidity that occurs. Two days ago, on the way to lunch, a coworker (Clemson grad that I get my tickets from) was talking about the morons in Louisiana that stayed put during the hurricane then wanted rescued. First, and this is just my personal comment, what a great way to weed out some of the gene pool. Second, the immediate thought that came to mind was Ron's comment about the gentlemen in Key West, tying himself to the tree. Ron said and I quoted "It's not that the wind is blowing. It's what the wind is blowing." Unfortunately no one knew the joke, not even the moron warehouse manager who has seen the video a few times. A minute or two later Clemson coworker made a comment about getting smacked by a street sign. I wanted to say something about it being in your spleen, but knew it wouldn't matter.
The first two CD’s of the Wha and Poot’s greatest box set of the last 35 years has been downloaded/ripped and sorted. They will be burned tomorrow and available for your listening pleasure during the tailgate. We will be exploring the some of the best the 60’s and 70’s has to offer with disk 1 and Southern Rock with a splash of Country on disk 2. Expect to see disk 3 – 80’s music that will rock your cock off, pre-Miami. We may even be able to throw together some of your 90’s favorites or a disk of “this is good shit but which disk should it be on?”