F-You Fortune Cookie Man

Ok, I know the little Chinese folk that run the cat buffet don't actually write these (they were started by someone in the San Fran area years ago and their are varying stories with some roots in ancient China) but I'm still gonna blame them. The sad thing is, I like the one we go to here, it tastes good and has 97.5 health rating. Unheard of in the buffet world. But they pissed me off todya. On to my story and issues. We all know I have an issue with over thinking and over analyzing pretty much everything. We also know that all fortune cookie messages should be followed with "In bed," or at least it's much more fun that way. Well, as if my complete analytical treatment of everything, including figuring out the best place to meet women and what their actions and words mean, I get slapped with this at the buffet today at lunch. "Your mentality is alert, practical, and analytical", in bed. Great, so I am cursed with the same problem between the sheets that keeps me from getting there to start with. I needed any help screwing things up instead of just doing the screw part? To top it all off, I'm head to Chucktown this weekend, where the odds are supposedly so good for guys. You know why I am going though? Oh yes, an engineering professional organization conference where I will be representing the Charlotte Chapter in all the business meetings, dorking it up through late afternoon Saturday preventing me from heading out on the town until then. Will I even feel like going out. Probably not since I have breakfasts for this damn thing at 6:30 both tomorrow and Sat. morning. Of course fortune cookie writer man has already screwed me. 1 of 4 engineers at the table and I get this one, real effing nice. F-you fortune cookie man, f-you.