Double Chin Bitchin'

As a exerpt to my weekend blabberings below I got really pissed a few times. While on date deux, I made a comment about two Clemson pitchers (Benson, married to the stripper, and Billy Koch). Baseball girl knew her timeline and quickly asked how old I was. I say 25 as not to lie. Both girls are caught off guard. I guess Clay knew but hadn't said anything. I have been around his wife no less than 3-4 time for extended periods and she just caught on I was 2-3 yrs younger than her. We all know I don't act more than 12 so it's gotta be the working mans 10 I put on after the college 25. To add insult to injury I go to the Y to take advantage of no joiing fee January. I'm wearing a Clemson cap, blue jacket and running pants and I had shaved for church, wearing no rings (class included). The first question the girl asks was if I was signing up for the family or single plan. Ok, fair enough, young people are married and the wife may have been at home, or better yet, I am a local grad student signing up my parents and myself. Of course I say single. The next question was "are you in the 30-54 range?" I about damn lost it threw the shroud of I will punch you in the ovaries if you say that shit again, bitch, grin. Oberg is laughin out loud. Now I know I have become some what portly. Why do you think I am going to sign up for the Y. Especially since screwed up throwing shoulders don't help when trying to lift dead weight. If you have seen pictures of males on my dad's side, we have a little extra pouch under the jaw. I have accepted it. Since when has that shit made me look 30+? I was getting accoustomed to 28-29 comments because I was typically meeting people when around friends who were 30+, without Paul or Oberg, and conversations were typically work related or at least more adultish. I just thought maybe I came off as mature when I wasn't drinking or around the crowd reading this. This shit has got to stop. Anyway one who knows a chin fat docotr get my ass areferal. I want that shit in a bag like in Fight Club so I can catch it on the fence when the YMCA bitch walks under.

Weekend Fun, Part 2

So Saturday night went much better as far as a civilized date goes. Met her at our mutual friends house and we all hung out for half an hour. She is pretty attractive, dirty blonde/brown hair, cute, nice body. She worls for MLB as a video scout Feb-May and off and on during the summer and fall. Loves sports and comes off kinda of country (or at least sounds that way, maybe just southern) though she lives in and is originally from Raleigh. We went to Maggiones (family style Italian, I recommend even for the Yanks out there who can probably name 14 better places in 30 seconds anyway, just for the shear volume of food) and had a hell of a feast. A couple drinks and finished up. Too late to catch a late movie so we go to Blockbuster. Girls make the mistake of letting Clay and I pick so we walk out with Clay purchasing both BCCT videos. Just as we start to watch the first the cut through you like a knife wind manages to disrupt power and everything that goes with it. We all go back downstairs to the fireplacei nthe living room and hang out a while with the fire going, shooting the bull. Clay starts to fade and his wife says she is goingto put him too bed. No forewarning given that says "Todd, time for you to go." I ask his wife if she is coming back downstairs and she says no as she heads up the steps. Says she will see the girl in the morning and I swear I think she said the same to me. Talk about auckward. Me, candles, a fire, a cool chic thats 29, had a really good time just talking and I am in a house I have never previously been too. We talk for a while longer, power comes on I turn off everything we had left running earlier, and figure it is probably time to go. Get a hug good night, probably should have tried for the kiss but passed. Called her tonight just to say hey. I mean, how often does one find a chic that not only loves baseball but works for baseball and is not butch. We will probably get together if I make it to Raleight, she comes here, or may just do something forh te hell of it. Anyway, not at all what I expected and I was pleasantly surprised. I don't know if my expectations were so reversed that I was let down by one and overly impressed by the other but there is a good chance of it. Guess we will have to see how the next couple weeks shake out. Needless to say neither live here, so one has to believe the essence of Horton has permeated CLT and I can now only date outside the city limits, never having really dated within them.

Weekend fun

So, um yeah. Had a date tonight. First "second date" in like 5 years. Got a couple pecks on teh lip but nothing special. She has been teasing me on the phone and email for two weeks. I just don't get it. I have another date tomorrow (differnt chic) this one is a double with friends though and blind on her and my end. Talked on the phone early this week. NC State soccer player a couple years older. Makes me not sound so country but kinda scares me too. We will see. I have afeeling that my "This is aweomse and I look like a pimp" weekend is going to fizzle into nothingness. I will update later but as of now the bit expectations are fading like my engineering GPA.

DAMN IT!

All you bastards are getting married,. 4 Weddings between the middle of May and the end of July . Factor in bachelor parties starting sometime in April and I can toss two months worth of weekends out plus my birthday and someone graduation that I not even aware of yet, but I am sure will come up. I will be well traveled at least but grad school is going to hate me. DAMN IT DAMN IT DAMN IT! You know what DAMN is, it's "D'MAN" twisted around. See D'MAN is behind this shit again. I bet he owns that cat that shits in my mouth on weekends too. Oh. I'm gonna find this sumofabitch and get 'em. Gonna get 'em reeeeaaaaal goooood!

Weather and golf

I saw an add on thye news late tonight about Goodwill donations for the needy children. Appareantly they are predicting that "cold winter." This comes as news to me as it was above 60 every day the past weekand the trend is supposed to continue for at least the next couple wit ha few days of 70's mixed in. Need I remind anyone its the second week of January? Even yesterday I hung one on, played golf in short sleeves and had a jolly good time, even broke a sweat. I have expereinced cold weather for 4 days this winter and that was the cold snap over xmas when it didn't get above 30 in TN for two days. My roomamate concluded and I agree that the follwing rule appies for areas south of the NC/VA line and east of the mountains: Winter is from teh 21st of December until the second of January and 10 randomly selected days during January and February. Otherwise the first of the year rings in Spring and fall ends with the college football season and the first week of bowl games.

I'm in Sales

"I'm Todd Horton, I'm in sales" Apparently it is the new punchline in Charlotte. I don't quite get the joke but everyone that randonly hears this said gets a good belly laugh. If you do to, then by all means, say it to yourself when you are feeling down and lighten up your day.

Nobrainer

Go to the following site and read the blogs: http://neubranderinc.com/blog/ I am much better when commenting on the stories of others and interjecting my own experiences. Plus I don't know the web address to this site and its easier to link to them and waste time when I am bored at home or work.

What the hell

Summary of New Years: Get somewhat drunk on everyones favorite, Jack and Ginger, go out with some friends. Fight asshole to elbow crowds, realize the bars are way to full to deal with and still pay enormous cover. Make 2AM booty call and actually pull some ass out of it. Friends who came back pull ass and hook up in car in apt complex parking lot, 9 people sleep in two bedroom apt with only one (my roommate) in largest bedroom. Earliest person crashes at 4:30AM. Women all leave between 8 and 9 next morning, guys arise around 11. Eat crappy Wild Wings food (guess cooks were hung over) and flake out for two hours. Beer drinking recommences at 4 or 5 with football throwing and poker. Slovenly drunkeness around 10 as we all head downtown. Hit 4 bars including Coyote Ugly, pull more ass as a group. Bring them back to the disaster area that should be condemed at this point and has more man funk than should be allowed. They hang till 4:30 then leave, about an hour after one of the females catches another reverse cowgirling one of the guys less than five minutes after departing the living room, on the toilet no less, bareback. Two girls is supposedly related to Char-Meck higher ups. Third girl leaves Oberg and I her number as we are the only ones who live in town and were the only ones not trying to be man whores at our own apartment. She had the nicest rack so we may have to capitalize on that later. Spent 4 hours cleaning Sunday and another 3 "airing out" the apartment. Thank god for candles or we would be repainting the peeled paint. All in all a good time though and would do it all over again...less the asshole to elbows street party thing.